3 30
I woke around 5 AM when the lights turned on at the shelter. I was able to get a bit more sleep, but I was already sitting up with my head on a table, so it wasn’t the best of sleep! Eventually breakfast was served and I read some. As the 30th day of the month, I went to Psalm 30 and Proverbs 30 (a tradition of mine at the time, correlating Psalms and Proverbs to the days of the month). While the entirety of Psalm 30 was a blessing, a little preview of the last half of verse 5 was “Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” The chapter speaks to how God calls us closer to Himself through the darkest parts of our lives. I was certainly to see joy as He “Turned my wailing into dancing (Verse 11)” today!
During this time, Bill, a black man with salt and pepper hair, maybe 50, who had sat across from me as I slept last night, encouraged me. He said that he had gotten in just last night for the first time, as I had. He said that it gave him great joy to see me opening up the Bible. He then proceeded to ask if I’d like to start a Bible study. I hadn’t been asked that question in the two weeks of Dupage County (a Chicago suburb) homelessness. We went outside, spoke about life, got into the Bible, prayed, etc. You might find this unbelievable, but Bill has been shot, stabbed, poisoned, and hung all on multiple occasions, yet God has sustained him. While most homeless people, Christian or not, hate their current situation, where practically no day is a good day in their minds, Bill was the first homeless man I met who was content in his current circumstance. Sure he was working hard to get a job and exit out of homelessness, but he was content with the grace of God on his life now. It was also a blessing to hear that he had been content in his former prison sentence. He went to prison for shooting his ex-wife’s boyfriend after this boyfriend raped Bill's 6 year old daughter. He said that it’s hard to find a job when you’ve got “attempted murder” on your record. He sees his current living situation, however, as a venue to glorify his Creator. While I’ve encountered a number of Christian homeless, few see their lives in such a fashion, mostly desiring nothing other than to get out ASAP. Talents that help them to serve others are often perceived by Christian homeless folks as things to be used once they’re no longer homeless. Bill was the most encouraging homeless friend and brother I had encountered yet!
After going back inside, I was walking alone with my Bible in hand and was approached by another black man, just a little older than me. He hadn’t even heard Bill asking me if I wanted to start a Bible study, but asked me the same question! What makes things even more improbable is that he hadn’t busted open a Bible in years! Bill, he, and I, remained with each other until we left the shelter at different times for various things that day. It was so good to be with brothers who loved me my first morning there after a scary first night!
In just over 24 hours, today and yesterday I encountered 3 dads who had dealt with bitterness for their only daughter being taken away from them. Two have been taken away entirely, and one has been taken most of the time. The first that I met yesterday was very hostile towards me when I spoke of his need for freedom from the bondage he had in hatred and bitterness towards the man who had cost him his job intentionally. A white guy of maybe 52 had held a maintenance position for 14 years. The last three years, he had a supervisor who didn’t like him. Eventually, the supervisor was able to entrap him so that he could justify firing him. Afterwards, he became homeless, and unable to afford his child support payments and in debt, he was unable to see his daughter. He hasn’t seen his daughter in years, and blames it on his former supervisor as he has been unable to find a job since. He loved to hear of recent troubles that his former supervisor had that he shared with me. I did not know him well, and was sorry that I had opened up my mouth after the hostile reaction he had when I said that it would be a blessing to be free. I’m still not sure whether I should have spoken or not, as my time with him was very short. Bill hasn’t seen his daughter in a long time either, who lives in New Mexico. It was wonderful to hear that Bill had received freedom from much of the bitterness and hatred that he had towards his wife’s ex boyfriend, whose shooting put him in jail with few job opportunities thereafter. Another man I chilled with wasn’t too happy at the need to yet again do many tedious court papers in custody battles over his daughter today, yet it was wonderful to hear that God had healed him from bitterness that came towards his ex for continuing to pursue a higher percentage of time with his only daughter. It was good to hear that he hopes to someday come to a table where reconciliation can go down with his ex.
Lucas, another friend of mine who lives in this city, picked me up after I spent some time with another friend, Zach. Lucas lavished blessings on me while I chilled at his place. I took a nap utilizing his couch (it was during the day, so I OK'd it, although this may have been the only time I OK'd something like this), he offered to wash my clothes, fed me dinner and other snacks, and he offered me a laptop while I was there to do whatever I wished on the internet. I was even able to speak with my family in VA via webcam! He offered me clothes, shoes, and other items which I refused (he gave me some weeks later when I saw the greater need). Lucas offered me so many things at his place that he even apologized on multiple occasions just to make sure that he wasn’t annoying me! It was such a blessing! He also told me about XXX Church, who were refreshing to hear about. They say, “God loves porn stars!” It was so wonderful to hear the truth being proclaimed in love and understanding of the grace that has been given to followers of Christ that we could never deserve, no matter our notions of goodness or piety!
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